Super addiction
Ever since I advanced to Junior, equal to a level in between being "competent" and "specialist", I have not fully enjoyed the speed of windsurf, at least not till tonight, It's been consecutive 3 days that I drove 40 mile one way just to see if the wind is high enough to get a flying feeling. I can not even believe myself to get off work at 5pm, rush through 40 mile rush hour traffic and landed the third day on the roll at Berkeley. The sky was gray, drizzling, miserable, however windy, that's all our windsurfers need, there are a few die hard windsurfer flying in front bay bridge, my heart pumped so fast that I wanted to crash every cars before me just to get there on time: 2 hour commute only for 20 minutes speedy fun. And I got that feeling. The trick is to lean your body as far behind and low and close to the water surface as you can, that's the flying feeling: it was beautiful.
I also find out that Ali Landry is my newly found old love girl: She is so sunny!! That's my type of girl.
Another 10 more days passed?
Time flies! Havn't been posting here for a while. Have been trying to advance to Junior windsurfing in the passed two weeks, eventually did. The junior board of 148 liter smoked! It felt like flying, I could not stop the damn thing! It's too light, too small for me for the time being, it's like a lightening, it's a whole new story comparing novice board. SF bay is windy and chilly, the new 70 to 300 mm f4 to 5.6 lens is not bad, I had some fun shooting nice pictures of club's supermans, they look good on the water, before the golden gate and city of San Francisco, the wave is high, they call high chopper, I went out sailing with David and Gene, the boat was like 60 degree to the water serface and it changes the direction before I knew.
XZ, Yuhui and I had excellent talk on knowledge trading, xz is super exciting since he got chance talking to some potential investor, I led them into the mindset of market survey's quality control. It was good.
Another superman, this time on the intelligence competition, yes, meet Mr. Zepu, who just finished phd defense at Stanford days ago and heading to U. of Chicago for post doc, ever since I met people like him at Stanford, I gave up the thoughts of getting phd at Stanford, there are too many smarter people who should get their phd before me, for now, I am just taking my time to be a startup and windsurfer, occasionally, a writer, maybe...btw, zp is leaving and he got lots of shit to move, man, Piled High & Deep: PH.D.
Real good advice in the bath room
As much as I love felicity, I respect her second counselor. There are lot of things that are meant to or not to be. She told felicity not to give up an opportunity to become a more interesting person. I wonder what I have done lately to become a more interesting person? Not my work, maybe a little windsurfing, a little stock market. Two years ago's Gambling experiences at Vegas pointing a 300 lbs bouncer telling him shut up or I would kick his ass without even knowing it, that made me a little more interesting. But lately, what have I done to become an interesting person. None, zero if it's not for the sake of being interesting. Going to cat and dancing like crazy made me a more interesting person, but it's been an old story, I wonder how long an old story like that will last. I need new adventure...
When Felicity
said "as much as I want her love what I wrote", I was almost in a shock that suddenly I recall all that fuzzy, exciting feeling everytime I turned in my paper: I can not wait no more for others to tell me what they think what I wrote, when I got the feedback, I can't help reading it again and again: Yes, I love writing, writing, maybe is the answer. In fact, anything similar to writing could be an answer to me, things like creating something others could appreciate: that's the answer my career questions lie.
Following a girl across pacific
Felicity is my favorite show. It's about this girl who followed her high school prince charming that she didn't even know to NYC, giving up doctor career and Stanford education, to constantly search the meaning of her young life. I have never thought about that, but all of sudden, that's what I did coming to America! Revisit a long article I wrote on 1995 after learning my long term dream girl came to America for her education, I wrote and wrote, nostop for 10 pages. The second day I registered for TOFEL, the next year I registered for GRE, 2 years later, I came to America from New Mexico to Sillicon Valley, it all started with her. I followed her all these long. She was beautiful, sexy, even worse, she was brilliant, she studied at best colleges and often talked about top 3 ranking in the class and ball room dance and dating doctorate student all that fancy stuff. Me? I was just another guy that she was interested in and curious about, for some reason. But I didn't have anything comparing to all that fantacy, I went to no-name third college at some barren suberb, I often had to hide my school name just not to disclose it to be laughed. My parents had low expectation for me, after I had been always a disappointment for things they wanted me to be. It was her that challenged me to challenge myself: a decent guy should not have done worse than her. That was my reaction, I hided my affection for her, not love, but definetely a bit of a crush. I have always tried to prove myself that I can do better, if I wanted to. Now everything has been proven, to her, to all my classmates that I am a decent guy. The only thing, and most important is to prove it to myself.
Inner voice
ken Cohen started ivywise, many people started their own thing out of passion. They all say it's a result following your passion. If you work your idea to your job, and work very hard and intelligently, it will lead to something, many people do the opposite, they take a random job and sort move on from job to job. That's exactly what I have been doing, I took a random job, all I have been doing after graduation is moving one sucker random job to another better one, but still, not something that I am interested. I find I am really good at communicating with younger kids, I am also interested in reading other successful people's stories; I love diversity, culture exchange: mainly to promote culture ambiguity than distinction since I believe people essentially are same. They share certain common sense and value. I am also a pretty balanced person which means I almost do everything, all things pretty well, such as sports, writing, school, singing, dancing. I have historically enjoyed and succeeded on hosting large event, starting up, coordinating, such as my college's annual freshman debate contest and firm wide celebration when I was 2 months into my first job after college. That will make me a good candidate for educational purpose, an allaround person who knows what to teach and talk to younger people. I wonder whether that is my inner voice. I wonder what I am doing on Internet knowledge sharing on education will eventually lead me to something I love and my happiness. Kat Cohen said your life starts from now, not in the future. How to start a real life NOW, instead of then or future: do things that your inner voice tells me to, relentlessly.
Most popular media
Still, it has to be the live show, TV show, or Movies. It is just better than still pictures. So, if I want to spread my idea, the best way is to put them on a show. I want to change the image of asians. Why it's so common on the TV to you see white guys with asian girls but when you see an asian boy with a white girl, it's like wow! I need to put this on the show, you know, grab people who might be interested, get them on the show. We don't have to go nasty, like porn stuff, all we need to do is to find right people do right things.
Sunday afternoon
Sunday afternoon is very strange, you don't have to work, yet it feels so much like end of all time fun, it doesn't feel as good as Friday, not even Thursday, when I have something to look forward to. Sunday afternoon is always sunny, bright, quiet, laid back, lazy, yet threatening. I don't know what to do. Just hanging out and looking out my window? I thought of writing, writing for a novel, for people I have come across in the past who have high impact on me. That way, I might easily be carried away by the storyline and characters. It might be a good idea.
New wave
It was completely not my expectation when I showed up at DNA lounge, I thought it would be just like last weekend, the 80's, the rock and roll. But it was all Asian, all hip hop. They look different, behave different, talk different, yes, I am Asian, and I am pround to be an Asian, to be specific, Chinese. Yet, I feel some much distant from all these Asian crowd. I feel more at home with 80's scene, no matter what race people are, they seem to be my type, they smile, behave, talk the same I do, they even shares the same looks I have, a man looks like a mature yet, flirtatious man, a healthy, smart, yet naughty boy. But people here are different, they seem to be superficial, too much booty. Girls appear to be trashy, slutty. By the end of night, I lost my entire desire to dance with anyone but getting trashy from one slut to another. What's the purpose?
Spotless minds' new discovery
As always, spotless mind is easily inclined to be transferred, influenced by environment. A few instances on SF chronicle's Sunday edition might have just done its damage to this faddish mind. There are two people of my age mentioned in this edition, one was similar to me, holding a job without knowing where to go in the future. He loves books and started writing Novels in 30 days: the only goal is to crank a novel within such short period, no matter the quality. Novels after novels, he suceeded. Speaking of being tired of daily job, the founder of dailycandy.com, a my-age girl, did her part of soul searching since 1999, started up a few companies, caught a pretty good time for instant capitalist.
While reading newspaper in our beloved bright kitchen, chewing cereal, Jim and I chitchatted a bit, he went to a friend's vineyard at Sonoma county and brought lots of grapes, those tiny, really grape looking grape with the original shape of a bundle before they were picked, they are murky green, or purple, not like the gigantic grapes sold at supermarket, they look really natural, taste one, the texture and sweetness is beyond perfect. We talked about his friend being a CEO of a tech company and own his vineyard, and they are all seeming to be involved with lots of interests and things, and best of all, they trumph at everything they touch, why? Jim said it's capital and passion. You need to have some sorta capital to get you started, so you need to have the most important seeding success, which is hardest. With the magic touch of passion, they turn capital into miracle. How true.
Same newpaper talks about the first fashion show (or festival) at San Francisco, the gigantic picture shows a model talks through the phone while hairstylist gets her hair done. The immidiate reaction is how they get so many friends, things to talk about? My personal cell phone barely rings once a day. But she has to talk while getting her hair done. Am I living a life?
Two words I recall learning recently is resiliance and reconcile. People at my work space say reconcile all the time. I first truely understand resiliance when listening to Amy Lee's My immortal. She has an amazing blue eye.
I'm about to go to the first ever live concert in two weeks for Alice's now and zen festival. I have not found anyone else to go with me yet but at least I am sure I will be going.
What about being a writer, besides being an entreprinuarer, no matter what I want to be, I will not become what I am doing now with my job.
